You must be pretty mad, in fact, I know you're mad. I was the bad friend, and I feel horrible about it. I think what really drives me insane is how you must feel. However, I lived in denial that I did anything wrong because my mind works in mysterious, silly ways at times. The person who could build you up in a matter of seconds, despite a horribly stressful day was nowhere to be seen. That person who you could take turns venting to from midnight until 3am was gone. It's like it's missing something important, mainly because it is.
When you lose a friend who you spent countless hours talking to on a daily basis, your life seems a bit twisted. I got jealous, I was dumb, I got angry over things you had no control over, and I made stupid decisions. You came home for a short time and I decided to spend time with people I always saw over you, which honestly makes no sense. I ignored you when you needed to talk to your best friend, sometimes on accident, but still.
